Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Baby G update....and a vent (sorry) UPDATED!

********** Parts of this post have been updated bc it seems that every one is nowing reading my blog and having issues.*******

So, Kiwi and I just did a two week roadtrip with my parents to OR. We stopped every few hours at some great places (many zoos, parks, etc.) to let Kiwi run and play (which is why it took 2 weeks.) It was a great trip!!

I am now 24 weeks along with Baby G. I feel him moving now. Low in my bladder it feels like. He is doing great and everything seems to be progressing as it should.

Now, I really need to vent. (Feel free to stop reading if you wish.) First though, happy news!! Just before my trip, I found out that one of my best friends and her hubby are expecting their first baby!!! I am so happy and excited for them. This baby was planned and very much looked forward too. (Early this year, they had unplanned pregnancy that ended in an early miscarriage. It was awful!) They are amazing people and will be the best parents! I can't wait to meet their little one. (Due to arrive early April.) OK, now the vent. If you've read my blog before, then you know that I have MAJOR in law issues. You also know that last May (2010) both my MIL and SIL disowned G (and Kiwi and I as well.) They literally told him that he was no longer a part of their lives (SIL went on to say that G was no longer her daughter's uncle.) Awful, disgusting, unforgivable things. Anyway, MIL cam crawling back begging for forgiveness w/in a few months. However, would never tell me that she was sorry, or that she would never again do anything like that, nor would she tell me that she would finally agree to and follow the boundaries. Therefore, I wouldn't go around her, nor would dI take Kiwi around her. She cried and complained at Christmas time bc she didn't get to see Kiwi. However, I (yes...me!!)took the first step and contacted her at Christmas to see if she was willing to tell me that she would agree to the boundaries that G and I had set up to protect ourselves. She never got back to me. So, in May of this year, after begging from G to go to our niece's bday (that same niece he was no longer to see) since both SIL and her ex (niece's dad) are both deployed in the Navy. I (yes, me again) reached out to MIL again to see if she was ready yet. She half hearted agreed. So, we went to the party. But I didn't speck to her, nor did I allow her to be alone with Kiwi. Anyway, Ithink I am rambling, I'll try to get on track. Our going to the party impressed SIL so much that she decided to send numerous gifts to Kiwi for her bday in July. This is the first time since the disowning that she has contacted us. (Except in Aug. to spew hatred and lies at us, then tell us to never contact her again. REal mature.) So, I emailed her to thank her for the gifts, and since she had made the contact, I decided that it would be fair then for me to finally be able to discuss the lies that she had said the year before. Clear the air... and I also gave her the chance to apologize and agree to never do the negative things again in order to be a part of Kiwi'w life. Her response to me was a big F you!! She told me to never contact her again. Basically I am not worthy enough to her (or MIL) to be able to have a conversation with either rof them, to be able to stand up for myself an my family, or to even defend myself. I was livid and told her that she was right, I have no reason to contact her ever again bc she is not a part of my life or my children's lives and she never will be....bc of her own actions. Me agreeing with her started a storm of nasty fb postings about me. To which G defended me and his sis treated awful, as she normally does. Our new SIL (married to G's brother last year) even posted that I was mean and hurtful and how could I keep Kiwi away from family. (Hello!? Is she really that naive, or has she just been lied to this past year? SIL and MIL disowned us, not the other way around. I now have to protect my children to make sure that they won't be hurt like G was by his own flesh and blood.) ANYWAY..... back on to my point..... (sorry this is so long.) While I was on my trip G called to say that our 6 yr old niece spilled the beans that BIL and our new SIL are pregnant (due end of April) with their first. He had to find out not from his brother, or his mom, but our niece.... lovely! (Updated: the fact that he learned this from his niece greatly upset G! He hates being the black sheep of his fam, recently bc of me, however he has always felt that way.)Now that he does know, his mother has been treating him awful. Throwing it his face that BIL is pregnant. (I have no clue why. They weren't planning this baby, she is still in school and he just took his first "real" job, they have 1 car and are both very immature!!)[Updated: Apparently they were planning the baby, and had been ttc for a few months w/o telling anyone. Secondly, perhaps it is their age or the fact that BIL is always acting so young that I think that they are immature. Although lately they don't seem as immature to me. Maybe it is the fact that I can "see"into their lives via her blog, where as before my only insight into them were G's words or my own observations on the few incounters I've had with them.) G's bio dad was never a part of his life, however his grandparents were. 3 years ago his Grandpa passed away. His mom is now throwing it in his face that BIL has decided to name the baby (if it is a boy) after him. (It isn't even his own grandpa, as BIL is half brothers with G.) When G got defensive and said that we are naming Baby G's middle name after MIL's own father, she said..."well, it isn't his first name!!" (How disgusting!!! She hated Kiwi's name and called he "that baby" instead.) She is also throwing it in G's face that no matter what new SIL's family does (as they hate BIL and basically treat him how G's fam treats me,) they will NEVER keep the baby away from them!!!!! G is so hurt by all this BS! I just don't understand how a mother can treat her own son this badly.....over and over again. She is so immature and selfish that she can't take credit (I can't think of another word) for her own bad actions!!

Anyway, long vent....thanks to anyone who actually stuck around. ****** After reading this, I thought that I should add some details. This is pretty confusing w/o knowing a few things. First, the reason SIL and MIL disowned G was bc for the first time since we had been together (4 yrs at that point) he stood up for me, took my side, against the bullying an dabuse from his sis and mom. Neither of them liked that, as they like to have control over him. So, it started with SIL threatening to disown him, then actually doing it (saying nasty things.) Followed by his Mom disowning him, then his Grandma (mom's mom) threatened to sell his horse (that she had given him years before as a graduation gift.) All of them did this (in my opinion, in hopes that he would flip sides, as he always did. (But, he stood his ground.) That is how disgusting these people are. Second, our niece is being raised by MIL bc SIL got orders last Aug. to go to HI for 3 years. She choose to not take her daughter with her (she isn't much of a parent anyway) but instead to have MIL raise her, along with our niece's dad (who was deployed at the time, and they were just going through the divorce.) Niece's dad is currently deployed again, so MIL is raising her alone. Which is why Gcan see niece. Whil eI was gone on th etrip, he got together 2 times with his mom and niece.

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